Loving Someone With ADD

Last year I found myself saying to my boyfriend, “sometimes I forget things, like my keys and that you love me.”

So I will be the first to admit that it can be a bit of a wild ride dating someone with ADD because our personalities have some special quirks.

I will always be more forgetful than most and may need a little help finding my keys. And my phone. And my sunglasses. Sometimes I will get all wound up and energetic at inconvenient times. I may be a little hypersensitive, but that gives me greater compassion. I will probably be more anxious than most people and maybe even a little needy once in a while. But it’s because I love deeply and fully.

Despite these “challenges,” I reject the idea that dealing with all these unique tendencies makes us difficult to love. In the past, I’ve had people get angry at me for being forgetful or a little spacey from time to time. But I’ve come to embrace that my ADD also helps me bring so many wonderful things to my relationships. So I refuse to feel ashamed.

Those of us with ADD offer something special in our dating lives. We will be more fun, more spontaneous and more willing to adventure on a whim. Our hypersensitivity makes us more open, loving, emotive and caring. While sometimes our hyperactivity may flare up at the wrong moment, it will surely be entertaining to watch. Knowing more about our own mental health helps bring a rare level of self-awareness to our dating life and having overcome some adversity because of our ADD in and out of the classroom, we are more empathetic and compassionate when others are suffering.

So find a partner who can learn to love all of your quirks and embrace the fun and joy that comes with your ADD. And if they’re really the one, hope that they also have a knack for finding your keys.

2 Self-Help Books That Will Actually Change Your Life

I used to feel a little lame rushing to the self-help section every time I went to a bookstore. Cliché titles turned me off and I worried people would judge me for being so obsessed with trying to better myself. But it continued to be my favorite section so I’ve learned to embrace my love for the sometimes cheesy genre.

I will be the first to admit that a lot of self-help books are garbage nonsense. But here are two I’ve read recently that have actually impacted my life in a tangibly positive way.

“The Healing Self: A Revolutionary New Plan to Supercharge Your Immunity and Stay Well for Life” by Deepak Chopra and Rudolph Tansi

This book found me right when I needed it most — when my stress was taking a serious, visible toll on my health. “The Healing Self” offers the perfect balance of simple tips and science to back them up and inspired me to take charge of my health today in order to help shield me from diseases like Alzheimer’s later on. The book not only helped introduce me to meditation but also gave me practical ways to change my thought processes to avoid stress and chronic inflammation. If any of you tend to be compulsively stressed like I am, this book will be a game-changer for you.

Positive Intelligence: Why Only 20% of Teams and Individuals Achieve Their True Potential AND HOW YOU CAN ACHIEVE YOURS” by Shirzad Chamine

I was skeptical of “Positive Intelligence” when I began reading because it seemed too simple. But the huge endorsements of some of America’s biggest leaders and Fortune 500 CEOs on the cover were too intriguing to resist. And I’m glad to say that “Positive Intelligence” really did allow me to dramatically shift my perspective. In fact, I loved it so much I frantically called my family to tell them to read it. I begged my friends to grab a copy. In an unusual way, the book tackles self-sabotage and helped me identify my biggest weaknesses so that I can really leverage my strengths. It allowed me to name my saboteurs so that I could recognize them in action and prevent myself from getting in my own way. It also offers a number of incredibly tangible strategies to help strengthen a more positive thought process going forward. “Positive Intelligence” was a huge catalyst for inspiring me to really improve myself.

It’s always a good time for self-improvement. So why not start now with these great reads? Comment what books have helped you grow!